you will never leave where you are
until you know where you had rather be


Wednesday, November 4, 2009

The thing that optimist are good at doing is only hearing the things that we want to hear, only seeing the things that we want to see and only understanding the things that we want to understand. Actually, that is exactly what a pessimist would do to, just that what and optimist want to know is different from what a pessimist does. Everything that I do not want to believe, I will block out. Why do I keep focusing on the little arrows pointing in the way I want, the way I need, the way that should have been from the very start? I know that all these are within the backdrop of a giant arrow going the other way, coaxing me to give up, gently, kindly...

If things are the way it should be, I am probably fighting a battle that I should be fighting. Of course I believe that this is the case. I am still fighting after all. But sometimes I just wonder if I am just fighting for nothing, investing my energy, time and spirit into something that is never happening. Wake up slaps after wake up slaps. If they do not even work, why am I even seeking them over and over again. I just cannot get out of my own self-delusion can I?

xw 7:38 AM



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